Tag Archives: Romantic Feelings

Slowly we come together, holding hands only in our minds and kissing in the shadows.
Slowly we see each other as we are, and accept maybe not only ourselves.
Slowly we strip and stand naked with our personalities exposed and raw.
Slowly we heal and understand.

We wait, we watch each other expecting the pain.
We wait for the darkness, we see it in the brightest light.
We wait for the deceit that never comes and the betrayal that lives only in our hearts and not each other’s.
We wait for the end, the doom, the proof that our pain is real and it’s not ours but each other’s.

I wonder why we don’t embrace the truth, the light and don’t let go of the shadow of pain that doesn’t exist.

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What is going on inside that heart of yours?
What is going on in that mind of yours?

You cooked for me, we watched a movie, we cuddled, drank wine and had sex. For goodness sake we had ice cream!
And then you turned colder than the iceberg that sank the Titanic.

I understand and respect that bachelor life that you can’t stop talking about,
I wonder who you are trying to convince? You or me?
What I don’t understand is what you do when it comes to me.

Now you’re hot and now you’re cold,
Now you are solicitous and kind, and now you are distant and so far away.

As my advice, you should have sex with someone who doesn’t care,
Who doesn’t care about you and then, they won’t get hurt.
As my advice, you should have sex with someone for whom you care,
Someone you care about and then, you won’t hurt them.

Black Hole

I am not who you think I am, and you are definitely not who I think you are. Which of course may be not true since I already distrust my first instinct of you.
Miracles don’t happen, waiting brings nothing, but how to act? Why, how, in which manner? I wish I didn’t have to be the one. I wonder why is always so difficult… For others seem so simple, so natural… And for me… Love is death and love is a struggle against myself. Love is pain and loss and… The abyss of darkness and forgetfulness. Love is a black hole.

When you look at me

I tell myself that it’s impossible,
I tell myself that we are not meant for each other,
I tell myself that it is only I who feels this way not you,
I tell myself I am not the kind of girl who could give you what you need,
I tell myself there is no future for me with you,
I tell myself you don’t want me,
I tell myself, I tell myself, I tell myself . . .

And then you look at me,
And then you smile at me,
And then you laugh.

With your laughter my whole being trembles,
With your laughter my thoughts melt,
With your laughter my dreams become possible.

Different

Soooo, I was watching Bones on Netflix and my mind started wondering. I am not sure why or how but it came to rest upon him.
I tend to fall in love quite easily, I tend to let my imagination fly without restrain and see a future together, see the potential in us. Of course, is always a construct and, on occasion for a short time it can become a reality. But, in the past, until now, until him I would . . . My mind and my heart would wonder and imagine the future life of all that could be. But not with him.

With him I cannot envision a life together, I cannot see the potential that we could have, there are no thoughts of tomorrow or thoughts of a relationship or . . . There are no visions of the future with him. And yet he never leaves me, he never leaves my thoughts.

With him there are only thoughts of sex and conversations,
With him there are only thoughts of his smile and his voice,
With him there are only leaping hearts and flying butterflies.

When I close my eyes I see him smiling and . . . I feel . . .
I feel something I cannot describe, something that makes me smile, something that makes me  . . . different. Different because I don’t want dinner dates together and the possibility of a future, I don’t believe we are meant for each other, I . . . I just want to lay in his arms, maybe not forever but as much as I can and hear his voice softly talking to me.

I just want sex and conversation. Nothing more. But is so strange because I don’t think I love him but I could.

It is strange because is only sex, but more than sex, it’s what I feel.
Confusion, elation, joy, sadness, more confusion, lust, desire, desire to run either to him or away from him, fear, self-consciousness, lust, lust and the irrational desire to be near him.