Tag Archives: Believe

Change

Around and around in my own head I go.

Wandering of wanderings.

Sometimes I see it so clearly, it’s so obvious.

Sometimes I clearly see I don’t see it.

What is it about him? What is it about me?

What is is it in this world?

Confusion and pain, in this I live.

In peace and death I wish to be.

In tears I drown, yet none I allow.

Because I know to not, not believe, yet endure.

Endure the reality of  . . . I don’t know what. I only know what not.

What is not, what it won’t. Be.

Be. It’s all I am. I am me.

I am me and I wander and I wonder and I ask.

No answer.

Never. No. Not. Always.

Always the same that it is not.

I know. I know. I even know why. But nothing will change.

I will change.

I need to change.

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Believe him

Believe him when he shows you who he truly is.

He asked me to go to dinner, we are not dating just fucking, just friends.

He asked me if he treats me respectfully, if he treats me right, I said yes.

He ditch me to dog-sit for a friend. He did not asked if I mind, he did not asked if I cared.

This is not respectful, this is not considerate.

“If you would have minded, I would have done the same. I wouldn’t have cared.”

We are not dating, just fucking, just friends. Don’t I deserve respect?

This is who he truly is. With me because there’s nothing else. Not caring if I care.

No respect for a friend, no respect for myself.

He has shown me who he truly is. I believe him.